i have found my love: Fun Things Like Families

I've just been reading the blog of a family who is going to adopt a baby (or possibly two). They already have biological children, but they are considering adopting some more little kiddos. It makes tears form in my eyes just reading their story. I don't even know this family.

Who would have thought that in college I would be thinking about issues like adoption? Not me, that's for sure. In my mind, I thought adoption was only something you thought about if you couldn't have children yourself. I thought it came through trains of thought like this:

"Well, I can't have kids of my own... so I guess that means I'll adopt them. Sign me up."

I never thought about things that needed to be considered before adopting: Where would you get the money to adopt a child? It certainly isn't free. Is your house big enough for a child? Would your car be big enough? And what about the emotional side of it all? Plus, you still have to be picked for adoption.

I guess in my head I imagined it to be like a store. You go to the adoption center and pick out a kid, then you take it home with you and shower it in wonderful gifts and such.

Good grief.

I was just a little bit clueless.

Going to college has made me think a little more about adoption. I go to a church where a handful of families have adopted - I can think of five adopted kids off the top of my head. They are all just so precious. Seeing all these little bodies running around has made me think about adoption more. Something about it stirs my heart. I don't know if that's something God would ask me to do, but I'm definitely not opposed to it.

God is doing a lot to change my thinking on things. Especially regarding family issues. I am kind of a control freak, and I like to take things into my own hands. I am this way with a lot of stuff. I used to have my whole life planned out. Get married straight after college. Work full-time at some great job, have two or three well-behaved children somewhere in there, live an easy life, tell people about Jesus somewhere in there too, and then retire in a nice house in a nice, safe neighborhood. It's such an American idea of a "good life".

Now, my thinking is a little different. God has slowly begun to change my thinking. First of all, I am to serve and follow my husband wherever God calls him. It's not really for me to decide. Of course we will talk about things and pray about things, but ultimately, he has the last word. In a world where women are supposed to be mighty and powerful do-it-all superwomen, that's hard to think about.

And once you get married, your primary job as a wife is to not only serve your husband but raise and nurture your children. If your full-time job is getting in the way of this, then something's gotta go. There are priorities that aren't in the right place.

Another thing that has been going through my mind is family size. I am one of five, and I always told myself there is no way that I would have five kids. It's too crazy, too much work, too expensive. I mean, I want my kids to be able to wear designer clothing and have their own sets of toys, unlike me who wore some hand-me-downs and had to share. I want my kids to have the best of the best. I want to send them all to college without financial problems. I want to spoil them rotten. And I don't want to drive a minivan.

Well, not really.

But you know what I mean. I was just thinking about myself and my perfect American life.

I'll be honest, I still don't want to drive a minivan, but who cares? You gotta do what you gotta do.

I shouldn't put limits on what God wants to do. He may want me to have a big family one day. I just have to throw my hands up and say "ok, Lord!" and do it to the best of my ability, for His glory. There is a couple at my church who have seven kids under the age of 10. SEVEN KIDS! They are all so beautiful. And well-behaved. I have fun just looking at them all. Somehow, she gets them to sit down and eat their food all at the same time. They are some pretty cool kids, too. God has provided for that family in awesome ways! They have not had any problems financially caring for their children. God is so faithful!

I just love how God changes my heart and mind about things. I'm not close to getting married and I'm certainly not close to having children, but it's cool to me that God has placed these things to think about in my life.

Does anyone else have thoughts like these? I feel like I'm kind of weird for thinking about this. I have also been thinking about birth control, but that's a whole other thing to get into. Haha. Anyways, I just thought I'd throw those thoughts out there.

I hope everyone has been having a good weekend! I have had a lot of fun myself. I went to BQ Ball on Friday night and had a blast. Here are a few pictures from the dance: